Dairy of a Madman

23 October 2009

Another week already?

Filed under: Uncategorized — visionsound @ 12:59 pm

I love the difference between calendar time and experiential time.  Not knowing without thinking very carefully about it whether something happened last week or three months ago… That overwhelming influx of experiences and memories in formation…

Adjusting to a new world is equal parts awesome and traumatic.  The awesome is perfectly logical; the traumatic is completely illogical.  Who still feels fear of the unknown in this day and age?

It feels good to be inspired again.  Creatively and metamorphically.

I wonder if this will make as little sense to me in three years as things I wrote three years ago?

14 September 2009

On death, and living

Filed under: Uncategorized — visionsound @ 3:06 pm

Rain blades are portals
Burrowing in ether
Through fleshes of souls
Deeper and deeper
Into the flames
Of words with no names
An unborn teeming oblivion
Yet still
I breathe
Awake
In this fathomless void
This bristling darkness
What is there to see?
In the blackest of shadows
An echo replies

The answer is nothing
The truth is the question
A sun-crested searcher
Beaming her bones
Fills up my lungs
With a new song of question
How can there be now?
If only I’d dream
Faster than light
Set fire to the past
Set the future to flight
See with the eye
For which I am the mirror
The pitcher; the catcher; the game

There is rhythm in this silence
Blood in this faceless wind
Pistons of white flame
Firing perfect unity
In the machinery of the beyond

Swallow the heart of God with your hands
Don’t trust your eyes if they see only tears

10 September 2009

Alone again…

Filed under: Uncategorized — visionsound @ 11:04 am

27 July 2009

Shadows of new dimensions

Filed under: Uncategorized — visionsound @ 1:38 pm

If you haven’t read FLATLAND by Edwin Abbot, it’s worth a read, especially from a physics/philosophical (philosophysical?) perspective.  This is the sort of thing that I love to have float through my headmeat when I’ve got time to ponder it.  You start thinking about things like this that are just too big to hold onto, and soon enough you start feeling like you’re on the edge of some bigger truth, just past the horizon.

And when stuck in these moments, it makes me sad that there is no more Carl Sagan around, to put it into words that the rest of us can understand and appreciate:

26 June 2009

My $.02, and this is all

Filed under: Uncategorized — visionsound @ 9:48 am

Michael Jackson apparently didn’t want to be cremated, per se.  Instead, since he is mostly plastic, he will be melted down and made into Legos so little boys can play with him for a change.

19 June 2009

If you’re not already a Pixar fan…

Filed under: Uncategorized — visionsound @ 9:58 am

Then you’re a hopelessly broken person.

But maybe, just maybe, this will restore your faith in humanity:

Pixar grants girl’s dying wish to see ‘Up’

10 June 2009

THINGS I LIKE: Vonnegut’s TIMEQUAKE

Filed under: Uncategorized — visionsound @ 1:42 pm

timequakeThere is no way a beautiful woman can live up to what she looks like for any appreciable length of time.

-Kurt Vonnegut

Timequake, it was said, would be Kurt Vonnegut’s last novel.  As it turns out, he was, in fact, sadly correct.  We all hoped that one day, Kurt would break his silence, get tired of not writing again, surprise us all with a broken promise.  IT never happened.

For a lot of people, that’s really too bad — the book was not well-received.  Which to me is too bad.  Certainly, some of his books are better as whole pieces, at least more accessible. And Timequake really isn’t a novel, as much as a collection of ponderings, and documenting the process of writing the first iteration of Timequake, and bits and pieces of that novel, and musings on life.

It’s that experimental idea that makes the book so wonderful to read.  Because it should be filled with a sense of disconnect, leaving you wanting a thread that runs through all, but it isn’t and doesn’t. Somehow it works.

The plot — such as it were — is simple, and brilliant in its simplicity: there is a timequake that rolls the years back a decade, from 2001 to 1991.  And when time finally resets itself, and starts moving forward again, everything happens exactly as it once did for ten years.  All the same actions and reactions, lives and deaths, triumphs and mistakes. This time, though, the person carries full awareness of what’s coming.

If you knew that you might one day have to relive these ten years of your life, would you be acting and reacting like you do?  Knowing with all certainty that you’ll have to relive it again?

Timequake is filled with bits and pieces, perhaps a final clearing space for Vonnegut’s thoughts that never found a larger home over the years. I don’t know if he’d be really happy about having to relive any ten years of his life, but I know that being presented with that thought helped me shaped my own life going forward.

I try to reread it every six or eight months — both to remind myself of certain things, and because if I have to rewind and relive my life, at least I’ll know that every few months, I’ll be reading a good book again.

Many people need desperately to receive this message: “I feel and think much as you do, care about many of the things you care about, although most people don’t care about them. You are not alone.”

-KV

14 May 2009

Four Funerals and a Wedding

Filed under: Uncategorized — visionsound @ 11:22 am

Our friend Jill finished her run with Leukemia yesterday.

I’m tired of writing about death and loss. So instead, here’s a playlist — for absent friends (and present endemics) — in memory of Jill, John, Moe, and Julie, and those who came before.

It was good to know you all.

8 May 2009

Need inspiration?

Filed under: Uncategorized — visionsound @ 9:21 am

The world is filled with magic and miracles.  You don’t have to look for the Virgin Mary’s face in a flood-scarred wall.  Just look to doctors that figure out ways to rebuild the severe physical destruction of domestic abuse, and the human spirit that perseveres and pushes on, and can still laugh.

If you can’t find inspiration in this, you’re less human than public perception of me.  And if you can watch this and still complain about your life, then eat a steaming bag of cancerAIDS and go watch Twilight again.

Read more at http://abcnews.go.com/Health/MindMoodNews/Story?id=7535591&page=1

3 May 2009

Eine Kleine Nachtmusik

Filed under: Uncategorized — visionsound @ 10:31 pm

KI by Devin Townsend:

Days alone, never felt like this
The lights of home, a year away
And it’s too late to fight it all, just drive.
And the streets…glow…and the night…
The night is soft

Soft

And it’s all inviting
as anyone could ever know
and this warm collective we endure…
We endure and pass the motive
We endure and pass the moon.
We endure and pass the moment
We endure.
We endure and pass the motive
We endure and pass the moon.
We endure and pass the moment
We endure.

So we fall on warm silence
I know we all go away.

The new album – titled KI, also, is available in June.  Order it.  You won’t be sorry.

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